There’s an elephant in the garden.


This is a little piece that was done the other evening at our writer’s group, the subject was kindly donated by my chum Andy Harden who also writes this sort of stuff, and which is published on Take a little look sometime if you have nothing better to do and need to fill in time. The same applies to this.

“Mum, why’s there an elephant in the garden?”
Oh, dear George I’m not sure that’s so, but wait, there is!
I do beg your pardon.

“It’s huge Mum, and it’s bum’s near the glass
It’ll smash the conservative, with it’s big fat ass”

Is it African or Indian, can you tell from here,
The difference is simple, the size of the ear.

“Too close to call”, screamedGeorge in panic.
“Shall I dial 999, it looks quite satanic”.

I think the boys in blue might not be too cheered,
by the thought of an elephant on the loose around here.

“Well what can we do then?” said George in alarm.
“We can’t keep him here, could we find a farm?”

“I could take him to school Mum”, said George in a mutter.
You can’t do that dear, they’ll think I’m a nutter.

Let’s give him some food and a small glass of wine,
then ask if he’ll stay, he’ll relax, he’ll be fine.

“It’s going dark Mum, and he’s still not been fed”.
Don’t worry George, said Mum, he’s asleep now in our  garden shed.

…and yes conservative is spelt right.

And for those of you reading outside the UK, we dial 999 for emergency services here in England.


  1. great picture Paul, I should of kept the idea to myself. Cheers, Andy.


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