Chip off the old block?

battersea-cods

Sheffield again , and silly names for chip shops. I suspect that the author of this one was a little reticent about it, as it appears on the bedroom window above the shop. Is there something in the water in Sheffield that makes them want to give their chip shops silly names.

For those of you reading outside the UK, the Battersea Dog’s Home is a refuge for homeless dogs. The connection with chip shops is tenuous to say the least, but of course we do batter our fish over here and it does come from the sea.

Time for a quick lie down in a darkened room to get over it.

Is it something in the air in Sheffield?

Perhaps it’s a Yorkshire trait, this naming fish and chip shops or indeed any retail outlet, with some sort of play on words. I’ve featured Codraphenia here before which is a small fish and chip shop in Walkley and┬áhas a drawing of a fish on a scooter in the window.

 

New cod

 

I’ve been to Sheffield again and on the bus up to Walkley ( again) spotted this one.

I mentioned it to my son who lives in these parts and he said that least it’s not as bad as the hairdressers around the corner who’s name is ” Curl up and Dye”. They’ve closed down. Serves them right.

Dead for 3 weeks? Whoopee.

deadfor3weeks

There’s a shop not far away from where I live that sells almost everything and has been there for years. The stuff in the window has been there for years and is yellowed with age. I’ve yet to venture in and look at the goldmine within. The owner is a bit of a free spirit, caring nothing much for the look of the place, or perhaps he does and can’t afford a ‘makeover’, and probably does not know what such a thing is. He’s apt to put his own news headlines on the window and this one took my eye.

I’m not sure exactly what it means but assume that the local pensioners ( again I’m assuming plural ) have had no phone service for 3 weeks, or perhaps an oap ( to us over here in the UK, that’s short for old age pensioner: not politically correct these days, but our headline writer is not ) has phoned to say someone has been dead for three weeks. I’m sure it needs punctuation somewhere, but I’m not sure where. I should have gone in and asked him, but have this vision of someone who might bark at me and kick me out for being cheeky.

The next image is from his massive display of toys, and where else can you buy a whoopee cushion on the high street these days. I suspect that it’s been in the window since about 1959. Whopee.

whopee

Leonard Cohen and weed control.

hardware shop

Where’s this? India,West Indies or perhaps North London. Third time right. This wonderful hardware shop can teach those corporate giants a thing or two about how to look interesting.It’s one of those rarities: a real hardware shop! There are few of them around now as they’ve been chucked out by the likes of B & Q, a store where I cannot imagine how they make any profit at all with their row upon row of power tools and things that no sane person would buy, and which have the effect of bringing on depression for the most happy go lucky beast.

Whereas this? It’s a joy to look at. I did not go in, which is a shame, forced to keep walking by the family, but I bet they can get most things for you and know a bloke who can mend anything too.

I have a fond memory of visiting a hardware shop similar to this some years ago and asking a rather geeky young man what he recommended to get rid of couch grass and similar weeds in my garden plot.With a straight face he said “Try getting a small portable record player and a few Leonard Cohen records and play them continuously and the weeds will kill themselves”.

He did not try to sell me chemicals.